Monday, May 15, 2017

Call this number on the telephone and get your subscription to ROLLing Stone

I remain unsuccessful in tracking down that Tom Selleck/National Review ad, but another favorite spot from my youth is on YouTube. It features Paul Shaffer, star of "A Year at the Top," as we discussed in a recent "What We'd Like to See."

Check out the advert below:

Shaffer is in top-notch "smarmy, sincere, both, or does it matter" mode.  There are two types of singing in this commercial: Paul's seemingly impromptu jingle at the end, which is great, and the Rolling Stone theme song that takes up much of this spot.  This song is horrible.

I saw this ad all the time back in the day, but I wasn't a subscriber. It's a good thing because not only does that song make me want to avoid signing up, but it is enough to make me want to cancel if I were a subscriber.

"I want to READ all there IS
about rock and roll"

Embarrassing. The way he sings "rock and roll" is cringe-inducing.

"Know about the people
who touch my soul"

Even worse. The overwrought "emotion" in the singing makes this instant appalling self-parody, as opposed to Shaffer's knowing self-parody.

Bless whoever is singing it because the guy is really trying to "rock out," but straining to rock out rarely brings positive results. It's one of the phoniest tunes I have ever heard, and it should have killed any cred RS had left after 20 years of publication.

I'm sure Shaffer knows how ridiculous it all sounds, but he doesn't care. His little half-assed rhyme at the end almost does the impossible: makes us forget about the other song.  It can't quite accomplish that.

On the bright side, it's 30 years later, and I remembered the Shaffer part, but I had totally forgotten the rest of it. So maybe all of you will get it out of your minds in the next couple decades or so.

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